Our week long, amazing vacation on a Disney cruise has come to an end. It was the first for many experiences and definitely an unforgettable vacation. The boys traveled on their first airplane ride, met many of the Disney characters, swam for hours in the pool and ocean, chased characters around the ship, napped in places other than a bed (which is nearly unheard of for my children), tried many new foods, watched amazing shows and stayed up WAY past their bedtimes! It truly was an unforgettable escape from reality. 
We enjoyed a week unplugged from our day to day lives and enjoyed EVERY single moment, smile and laugh on the cruise ship while we were on board and docked at different ports. 

Now, as our vacation has come to an end the Sunday blues are in full effect, which this time they are much worse than after any other vacation. Tomorrow it’s not only back to the grind of our daily lives but I will be expected to arrive at the University of Pennsylvania hospital very early in the morning for surgery…again. 
All of my other surgeries I was scared…a different kind of scared -the fear of unknowing/what to expect. This time I know a lot more, which at times can be a good thing to typically ease some anxiety, but this time knowing what’s coming is absolutely horrible. Every other surgery that I’ve had I have been told they THOUGHT the cancer was gone.  Of course this time I hope to hear the same thing, BUT this time it is going to be much different depending on how much cancer is found and the formation of the cancer will determine the next treatment plan. I know I can handle surgery, I’ve done it many times before but after this, surgery may no longer be an option. The thought of radiation absolutely frightens me beyond belief. I try to block it out of my mind, but I can’t. 
At this time, I can only hope….wish….dream….PRAY that the cancer found on the right side of my neck is minimal and formed in a way that surgery will be the cure. Tonight I plan on squeezing all of my children tight, especially Natalie since she did not go on the cruise with us, giving them a big kiss while they are sleeping in the morning when I leave for the hospital and continue hoping that the Magical Dreams from Disney follow me into surgery. 
Tonight I’m going to continue wishing upon a star…